I decided today that 2014 is going to be The Year of Saying No. That might seem negative or pessimistic, but I am a people pleaser. As someone who will say yes to a conference call even if it means being double-booked, an evening meeting with a client even when I had my heart set on kickboxing or a social obligation when I’m dead tired because I’m afraid of missing out, it’s finally occurred to me that I need to have boundaries.
When I worked at my first public relations job in New York, I was petrified of being fired. I was never at any time actually at risk of losing my job, but in a cutthroat, competitive industry I was afraid that the slightest slip or mistake would result in the unemployment line or worse, moving back home with my parents. Even when my workload was two or three times what it should have been, I felt compelled to take on every extra assignment and every request from my boss with enthusiasm (my boss was just as stretched as I was at the time, if not more since she had the responsibility of running the department). This displaced dedication contributed both directly and indirectly in a long and extended illness that included a hospital stay, more anxiety than I care to address in public forum and overall, a pretty negative outlook on my life.
Yet, it was during those terrifying early days of my career in PR that I learned most of the fundamentals that eventually helped me branch out and run my own business. In many of my business dealings, I find myself thinking back on my coworkers: “what would Ann do?” or “how would Jamie have handled this?” I write with the attention to detail that I learned on my first job and I manage my relationships with the media as though I was still copying my superiors on every single email so that they could assess my performance and progress.
Now that I have been out on my own and running my own business for three years, I’ve realized that just as saying yes to every obligation that crossed my path in the corporate world was not the way to manage my time, it is also not a smart way to run a business. When you are self-employed, when a client or project comes your way, instinct tells you to take it regardless of how many other responsibilities are on your plate. What if another opportunity doesn’t come along? What if I pass on this and it turns out to be an epic mistake? The same theory applies to social or networking obligations. What if I pass on a dinner party invitation or send a colleague to a media event in my place and it turns out I would have met an important contact or built a key business relationship?
Just as telling my boss that I didn’t have the time to take on one more project or responsibility at work in 2006 wouldn’t have resulted in instant dismissal, I’d like to believe that passing on opportunities that don’t feel like a fit won’t lead to the crumbling of my business. In fact, I believe that it’s the opposite and want to make 2014 the year that I seek companies that I want to have as partners and colleagues with whom I want to collaborate. I’m at a point right now where I have a great mix of clients, colleagues, business partners plus a challenging but manageable workload. By settling for less than that and worrying about the consequences after the fact, I am only going to hold myself – and my business – back. This month, I’ve already passed on two opportunities that didn’t feel right and you know what? The world hasn’t come crashing down around me yet. By saying no and being more selective in my personal and professional life, I want to have more time for things that are important (even things that seem inconsequential, like 8 hours sleep).
Whether you’re a blogger who is generating an income through advertising or you have your own professional company, biting off more than you can chew is an instant precursor to stress.
My segue into this recipe (because yes, there is one) is that when I am stressed out, I am much less likely to cook. When I am stressed out about work, I like to tether myself to the computer in attempt to work out whatever it is that is bogging me down: a challenging project, a new business pitch, a tight deadline. It’s ironic, since cooking is something that I’ve always looked to as a creative outlet, so it shouldn’t be the first to go (like..you know, the gym).
While 2014 will be my Year of Saying No, it will also be the year that I adjust my expectations in the kitchen. Cooking doesn’t need to mean baking all of my own bread from scratch or making three meals a day five days per week (really, Maris, knock off the perfectionism). What I will instead do is look to the ingredients that I like and the stories and memories that inspire me to create recipes and share them. Enter, Israeli Couscous Salad with Butternut Squash and Cranberries.
Simple, healthy and easy to make a big batch of on a Saturday or Sunday and eat as a lunch or side dish throughout the week. Even if this seems like it makes a lot, I can assure you that it will be gone before you even realize it.
via:http://ingoodtasteblog.net/in_good_taste/2013/12/the-year-of-saying-no-recipe-israeli-couscous-with-butternut-squash-and-cranberries.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+ingoodtasteblog%2FgeTG+%28In+Good+Taste%29
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